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Joined: 6/19/2001
Posts: 5468
Posted on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 2:20:00 PM
Pochemu mi lubim tekh kto k nam khuzhe vsego otnositsa? Chto to zdes ne to....no u menya eto pochmu to imenno tak.....
Joined: 10/2/2001
Posts: 37048
Posted on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 3:47:00 PM
-) Byvaet i huzhe. Ja ljublju ili ne ljublju vne zavisimosti ot togo kak ko mne otnosjatsja...
Joined: 7/9/2001
Posts: 2006
Posted on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 4:02:00 PM
Davaite poeksperementiruem. Ia budu pisat' vam vsiakie gadosti a vi menia lubit' :)
Joined: 10/11/2001
Posts: 67
Posted on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 4:18:00 PM
Mi uzhe "lubim" Shaitana za eto.
Joined: 9/12/2001
Posts: 1178
Posted on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 4:31:00 PM
"Чем меньше женьщину мы любим, тем больше нравимся мы ей"... А.С.Пушкин.

Joined: 11/14/2001
Posts: 29
Posted on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 4:49:00 PM
Potomu chto kogda k nam otnosyatsya horosho, mi ne mozhem do polnoy stepeni oshushat' ostrotu svoih sobstvennih chuvstv.
Joined: 8/2/2001
Posts: 3146
Posted on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 5:42:00 PM
I've never had this experience... If someone treats me in a less than deserving way, I quickly get rid of them from my life completely, I rarely ever give anyone a second chance unless they're family.
Especially with all of my ex lovers...whoever treated me bad, they have all been thrown out of the window...instantly. I have very little patience for jerks.
Joined: 8/2/2001
Posts: 3146
Posted on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 5:52:00 PM
Sometimes I think that LOVE isn't worth all this trouble.
Joined: 9/15/2001
Posts: 9681
Posted on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 6:07:00 PM
А не играет ли нами чувство завоевания? Тут же фокус какой получается, когда мы получаем любовь, хорошее отношение, нам это быстро надоедает. Создаётся гонка за любовью там, где её труднее достать. Самое главное чтобы после этой гонки, вам человек снова не надоел. Так как обычно, когда мы в конце концов добиваемся того что хотим, мы теряем интерес к этому.

И опять же, это теория, пардон за обобщение.
Joined: 8/2/2001
Posts: 3146
Posted on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 6:20:00 PM
Cevernij, eto znakomaya teoriya, tak tozhe bivaet :~)
Joined: 7/3/2001
Posts: 102
Posted on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 6:33:00 PM
kto-to uje zadaval etot vopros i otveta vidimo ne sushestvuet...

why do we hurt those who love us, and love those who hurt us...
Joined: 11/13/2001
Posts: 27
Posted on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 6:45:00 PM
ну что вам сказать..приходите ко мне в подворотню, я вам там все популярно объясню!
Joined: 6/19/2001
Posts: 5468
Posted on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 7:10:00 PM
Thanx gang for your replies,

I usually pay very close attention to signs that I receive from the Universe. I asked this question and I got my answer. Not the answer to this question in general, but the answer I was searching for. I found it in a book I picked today, which talks about synchronicities and coincidences. While I was quickly glancing through I got swoosh of goose bumps on the skin, like a little chill. Every time I get this chill out of nowhere I stop and concentrate. Here is what I read:

“……In this journey, we are aided by already established pathways in the brain, which he called archetypes. As we grow psychologically, we can realize, or activate, these archetypes and in so doing progress toward self-actualization. The first stage of growth is one of differentiation, during which we become aware of ourselves in the cultural milieu in which we are born and begin to individuate. This means we have to find a niche for ourselves in the world we learned from childhood, a process that includes becoming educated, assessing the economy, and finding a way to make a living.
As we do this, we sharpen our ego power and our will, replacing our learned set of automatic reactions with logical way of interpreting events that becomes our own way of standing out, extending our self in the world as a unique person with unique views. This stage is at first somewhat narcissistic (selfish) and often inflated (egotistical) but eventually fully activates what Jung called the Hero archetype. At that point, we are ready to find something important to do in the culture; we feel proud and determined about accomplishing it……”

We can’t give until we have something to give. We can’t create outside of ourselves until we had created ourselves. This is very relevant to the person in question. I realized that He is this bright star that polishes his angles. A young steer (bichok) that is happy to be alive getting familiar with the world, naturally narcissistic, caring only for himself because he does not know how to care for others. This is whom I am trying to get over. But now I understand and I can really see it.
Joined: 10/10/2001
Posts: 9593
Posted on Thursday, November 15, 2001 10:21:00 AM
Everybody loves attention (to some extend anyway). The problem is that too much attention some times might morph into annoyance.
Looks like it is a very common thing when you become more interested in someone who couldn't care less (somehow I find it is more so for women than men). What do you get out of it? Sense of extra challenge? I must/want get him/her even more now? It looks to me like a very good ground for mind games. Be careful whom you open your weaknesses to: you might not be as good of a "player" as the next person after all....

If that's what it takes to get your attention, then no wonder we have so many mean people around...
Joined: 6/19/2001
Posts: 5468
Posted on Thursday, November 15, 2001 10:56:00 AM
Interesting post, pitachok

Especially the mind game part. You know I tought about. I thought that that is partially why my relationships are not very long-lasting, because I DON'T play mind games. It is like it is, I am who I am, and if I try enough I'll allow you to be who you are. The purpose of my relationships and the goal and the lesson each one of them tries to teach me occures much faster then if I would have played mind games. Mind games are theatrical, passionate, nervous, create the sense of exitment, struggle and ACTION that otherwise "honest" relationships would not have (from that perspective). I don't fuss about longetivity, they are as long as they need to be, what I do care about it, is when relationships are streched artificially because of the mind games.
Joined: 10/3/2001
Posts: 172
Posted on Thursday, November 15, 2001 3:06:00 PM
Лично со мной такой ситуации ни разу не было. Вообще любовь как сильное чувство в моей жизни была лишь один раз несколько лет назад. После этого ни разу она не повторилась. Во всех моих взаимоотношениях с девушками мне ни разу не пришлось добиваться расположения кого-то, кто ко мне плохо относился. Кто-то здесь правильно сказал, что с женщинами это происходит чаще, чем с мужчинами. Если человек относится ко мне плохо или недостойно, то мне гораздо проще избавиться от него, чем добиваться его дружбы или тем более любви.
Joined: 3/23/2001
Posts: 262
Posted on Thursday, November 15, 2001 3:53:00 PM
Masha znaesh'y menya tozhe samoe:D Kogda chelovek nachinaet ko mne kelitsya...obrashzhatsya so mnoi xorosho do ne bes podkidivat'ili prinosit'na pervoe svidaniya tsvetochki menya eto nachinaet razdrazhat'...a vot kogda on so mnoi strogii i drzhit v ezhovix rykovitsyax ya ego znachinau bol'she lubit':))) pochemy?
Xotya inogda etoi dobroti i ne xvataet kogda chelovek s toboi vse vremya gryb...i ne vsgda skazhet kak sil'no on tebya lubit:)
po moemy vsego dolzhno bit'v mery I KNYT I PRYANIK:)) eto moe:))
Joined: 9/12/2001
Posts: 1178
Posted on Thursday, November 15, 2001 4:34:00 PM
You girls are pissing me off :) Geez. I am reading this, and more I read, more I think that it is ether me or half of people here are not normal. Knut i Pryanik, Mind games... Where did NORMAL relationships where one loves another and another and otherway went. For instance, I can not imagine myself to be bad with someone I have romantic feelings to but sometimes I force myself to be cold and whatever because I know it is better for freaken soap opera that you people today call RELATIONSHIP.... This does not make any sence!
Joined: 6/19/2001
Posts: 5468
Posted on Thursday, November 15, 2001 4:41:00 PM
Why does it piss you off MadOne?
Joined: 6/19/2001
Posts: 5468
Posted on Thursday, November 15, 2001 4:42:00 PM
I think you misse the point behind the mind games message.

Don't get pissed off, nobody is against you, as I said before.
Joined: 9/12/2001
Posts: 1178
Posted on Thursday, November 15, 2001 4:44:00 PM
wow wow wow, note the smily after piss me off part... girls... it is a figure of speach.

Malishka, nobody is mad here :)
Joined: 9/12/2001
Posts: 1178
Posted on Thursday, November 15, 2001 4:49:00 PM
regardless of that, I HATE mind games, I think that if you need mind games to keep relationship going and exiting, then to hell with relationship. (by the way, I am with you on this one Malish). I also hate all this knut i pryanik bussiness. Nothing personal here of cause. I just think that if you care about person, and he/she cares about you, you can not possibly expect or allow or even accept that person being a jerk to you as it would be display of the fact that person does not give a shit about you. For me it is simple as that. Rub me right way, and it will work, try to play that knut game and to hell with you regardless of concequenses.
Joined: 3/23/2001
Posts: 262
Posted on Thursday, November 15, 2001 5:10:00 PM
MadOne znaesh'ya vstrechalas'so mnogimi patsanami v svoei zhizni i pochemy to vse oni ne mogli otkrito pokazat'ko mne svoix chustv xotya ya znala chto ya im doroga i oni menya v kakoi to stepeni lubyat...mozhet odin iz nix tol'ko otkrivalsya do kontsa a tak net:(.....vot seichas k primery ya vstraus'a patsanom..y nas seréznie otnosheniya delo doxodit do svad'bi no!on ne vsegda so mnoi laskovii...a ved'lubit bezymno i ya eto znau....da mozhet kogda vi'pét 1000raz skazhet chto lubit i kak ya emy doroga a na trezvyu golovy????...i znaesh 'mnogie myzhiki nekogda nichego otkrito skazat'ne mogyt...pokraine mere eto moi zametki...ti so mnoi ne soglasen s myzhskoi storoni???
vsegda odin lish' lubit a vtoroi lish' pozvolaet sebya lubit'...tak yzh' mi zadymani:))
Joined: 9/12/2001
Posts: 1178
Posted on Thursday, November 15, 2001 7:18:00 PM
I do not think so. I know I am not this way and if I like someone I will say that just as if I do not like some one I will. When I said no mind games, I ment it. On another hand, I did have girlfriend for 4 years and never had those in relationship ether. So I guess people are different and if you prefer that way, then this is what you will get :)
Joined: 9/12/2001
Posts: 1178
Posted on Thursday, November 15, 2001 7:21:00 PM
kstati Malish, aren't you being overly protective of me for some reason? you keep looking for the moment to spot when I am realy mad :) note the Nick... it is a permanent state of mind :)

Edited by - Mad0ne on 11/15/2001 7:21:58 PM
Joined: 6/19/2001
Posts: 5468
Posted on Friday, November 16, 2001 12:04:00 AM
You know that I know you MadOne....:) (I am psychic remember?:)

I am not being protective, I am being observent.....
and I know what stands behind "You girls are pissing me off :) Geez"
You you should know better, that I try never to pick on words, rather the content, the truth, your state of being:)

Joined: 9/12/2001
Posts: 1178
Posted on Friday, November 16, 2001 8:10:00 AM
no comment Malishka, I feel like an open book in front of you :) hehehehehehehe
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